Stephanie, you are definitely not alone! I completely understand what you have said! My hubby will say something about something I have forgotten or didn’t end up doing as well as I normally would, and I feel like the wind is taken right out of my sails. I feel like, the world is coming down around me (kids issues, housework piling up from being sick or having been on a trip or something, projects going on, meals made, kids bathed, schooled, etc.), and…this…is what he notices? Not alllllll the work I’ve been doing? Not the physical and emotional struggles I’ve being going through? I know if I was running a well oiled machine perhaps it wouldn’t make me feel like this, but he would still be unhappy with something and he doesn’t realize how deeply I take it. I am working on fixing things around the home with this course, but just wanted you to know that you are not alone in feeling discouraged by the words of your husband. All I can think of for advice is, we can only examine ourselves, work on what needs worked on, give ourselves grace and not beat ourselves up for not being 100% superwoman right out of the gate, and pray for our husbands to have softened hearts and some empathy, or whatever they are needing, all while humbly praying that we would do the same for him. Sometimes, it seems that my husband will make those comments more often when he is being neglected. When things are crazy around the house, AND I’m not attentive to him and what is going on in his life. I think sometimes he probably feels like since we had kids, he has lost his wife. He may be right. Anyway, not sure if that is helpful or even correct, but just some thoughts that came to mine. Hopefully some wiser ladies will chime in here, and I can learn too! I am in the same boat! :). Hang in there! Oh, and also, don’t forget to take care of yourself physically! I know myself, I am physically run down and exhausted, and am trying to do things to just feel better and get healthier. Pursuing a possible thyroid condition as well. Don’t be afraid to take care of yourself. A hot bath, a homemade facial, some relaxing music, or some quiet time, it can do wonders for one’s spirit after working all day in the trenches! P.s. One last thought (or was that the 7th last thought, lol), if you can think of your husband as a fellow heir, as someone like yourself, with struggles that you are not seeing, and being attacked in spiritual warfare that you cannot see, and that he may not be sharing with you, then it makes it easier to let those little comments roll off your back, and feel compassion for the man who is working hard out in the world, that is carrying it quietly alone. Ugh! When I think of that, it makes me soften towards him right away, and not take it personal. You guys are in this “war” together! And the prize at the end is so worth it! (Sorry for being long winded).
